Our First Scare

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It’s inevitable that it would come. Today, we had our first little scare with baby Ellie who is just a little over 2 weeks old now. I was enjoying a quiet morning of worship at home while the family was at church and had just finished spending time with the Lord and praying. I had just put my head down to try and get a quick nap in and I heard little Ellie stirring and crying in an unusual way. So, naturally, I went to check on her and and noticed that she was blueish in color and gasping for air. I scooped her up quickly and turned her face down and began patting her back all while grabbing the phone to call 911. I ran back to my room to get the suction bulb and started suctioning her nose and mouth which were filled with mucous, and slowly she started to get bigger breathes of air and her color turned normal again and it was as if nothing had ever happened.  I texted Kevin with the text you never want to get “come home now, 911” and he ran out of church and was home before the ambulance got here. Funny how I had just got done praying and thanking the Lord for the precious gift that baby Ellie has been to us and for the joy that she has brought to our family these past two weeks. And I was reminded once again in a split-second that she belongs to the Lord and that her life is in His hands. As I held her, I felt so helpless because I could only pat her and suction and hope that she would find breathe. But every breathe is from the Lord – and He controls it all. It’s not ironic that I’ve learned this lesson with each of my girls when they were babies. With Ashtyn – it was watching her suffer through febrile seizures and with Jada it was a a choking incident, and a few more scares in between.  Each time, I’ve walked away a little shaken but assured that no one could love my girls more than my Lord. And so once again, today, I was reminded to parent with a loose grip, keeping my hands open before the Lord so as not to hold on to dearly to that which I love so much. Ellie truely is a joy to me, and today’s scare reminded me to never take her for granted no matter how many sleepless nights and poopy diapers there are…

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